The aggravations of Gamer Mom

On Friday, my pass for PAX East arrived. Super exciting, right?



I’ve been working on a costume for the last month, and it’s starting to come together, so the whole event is starting to feel very real to me. I’m going with two friends, and only on the Friday of the weekend, because that’s the only weekend that really has anything I’m interested in going to.

And you’re probably wondering what exactly I’m planning to go to. If you want to see my schedule, you can read it here.

You might be saying “Well, gee, this looks like you’re really excited to go to PAX.” And I would respond by saying “You are so, absolutely right, I can’t wait!” Then you might be wondering what is wrong with me, and why I am aggravated.

Let me tell you.

1) When my parents found out I am attending PAX East in costume, my dad just about lost it laughing. Now, yes, it kind of hurt my feelings. But, I have to remind myself that I did not grow up a gamer, and my parents have no understanding of gamer culture, and the fact that it’s totally normal to go to a gaming conference dressed as a character from a video game.

This first reason I am aggravated is a relatively small reason, and I think when my parents understand that it’s not just going to a big room and playing video games with a bunch of strangers, they’ll be a little more understanding.

2) My mother-in-law can’t understand why “a mom” would go to a gaming convention.

Is that all I am? I am JUST a mom? That’s all I get to be now?

Excuse me while I go puke.

I do believe that it was a mindset at one time that you were a mom first, and the rest went by the wayside after your kids were born. And, I believe that, also, but only to an extent. I’m also a wife, a friend, a daughter, a sister, a knitter, a gamer, a crafter, a social worker, and various other things. My family will ALWAYS come first, but I am a far better parent if I take time for myself to do things I enjoy.

So, why shouldn’t I go? Let’s start with the fact that I’m going with friends. Then we’ll add on that three of the 6 major things I want to attend actually are relevant to my every day work life. It’s an awesome way for me to connect with a lot of my clients in a way that doesn’t remind them that they are homeless. It never ceases to amaze the kids when they find out that I am familiar with D&D, Dragon Age, Skyrim, Neverwinter, etc., and it gives them a way to connect with an adult in what could be a potentially fragile situation for them.

So yes. I am a mom, and I’m going to a gaming convention. Because it’s going to be, most likely, a rare occurrence for me to go to. It’s a long day when my kid is so young, yes, but I lucked out this year that my dad is going to pick up my daughter and take her to sleep over at my parents for the night.

Yes. I’m a mom, and I’m a gamer. The two are not mutually exclusive. I can be a mom with other interests, and I can be a gamer if I am a responsible parent first.

Yes. I’m a mom.

Yes. I’m a gamer.


5 thoughts on “The aggravations of Gamer Mom

  1. Yes. You’re awesome.


  2. Indeed, my parents don’t really understand adults “gaming”, even though they play games on Facebook themselves. I guess they just see it as a different kind of game, which it definitely is, but they also didn’t grow up in that generation. Most gamers are between 25 and 40, which was certainly not what they (or even my older brother and sister) did when they were between 25 and 40.

    I think it’s great that you’re going, and if I wanted to spend the money / sub out of work and gigs to go (It would cost me $110+spending, $75 in lost work and and $35 for the ticket), I’d be going, too. You certainly can be and are a responsible mom but if you don’t take a day or two to do the other things you enjoy, you’ll regret it.

    • Thank you, and I appreciate your willingness to be flexible so I can do this. I’m really looking forward to go, and I cannot wait to experience it.

  3. bearonthecouch

    “My mother-in-law can’t understand why “a mom” would go to a gaming convention.”

    Because it gives you something to connect with your kids about? Maybe not yet, but having well-developed hobbies of your own separate from your kids is critical. So much of who I am as a person comes from growing up watching my dad reading comic books and gaming. And then, as time went on, I went from “watching” to “joining in” – And my first con? With him. I was 8 or 9. And only when I went to college was I able to look back and say “holy shit, my dad took me to a gaming con when I was 8 or 9, how totally awesome is that?!”

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